How to Overcome Writer’s Block & Fear of Rejection by Vangile Makwakwa
Please welcome guest columnist Vangile Makwakwa to Writer’s Fun Zone! Today Vangile discusses how to overcome writer’s block and fear of rejection. Enjoy!
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Fear of rejection is one of the biggest blocks to creativity and can lead to writer’s block.
All of us are born believing we can do the impossible and that the world is open to us but somewhere along the way we encounter rejection and convince ourselves that we’re not good enough.
This small loss of faith in ourselves leads us to give up on our dreams. Unfortunately, this is most common in the creative fields where we face a lot of criticism and rejection.
Fear of rejection & writer’s block
Writing has always been my escape from reality. Poetry and writing kept me sane in my teens when I ran away from home, worked 3 jobs to survive and paid for my way through varsity.
I’d put on head phones, put pen to paper and start crafting stories or poems from the ether. It was all so easy and effortless.
So it seemed natural to me that I’d graduate from business school and start a writing company. But when I told my entrepreneurship lecturer my plans she told me I’d never make it in the industry. She gave me all the stats about “failed” and starving writers and suddenly this fear of rejection set in and I became blocked for 3 years.
I rejected my own writing before I even got started.
Understand the underlying cause of writer’s block
The problem isn’t your writing; the problem is what comes between you and your writing.
You’re a great writer, yet your fears and other negative emotions are keeping you blocked, holding you hostage and keeping your inner muse imprisoned.
My teacher isn’t the reason I became blocked; I became blocked because I had a deep rooted fear of rejection and failure.
I’d spent years carrying these fears around and my teacher’s comment simply triggered something in me and brought these fears to the surface.
For me to become truly unblocked I had to deal with the underlying causes – my negative emotions, namely my fears of rejection, failure and even success.
How to overcome fear of rejection
1. Acknowledge your fear of rejection
Until you acknowledge your fear, you can’t release it. The best course of action is to just breathe and acknowledge that you’re feeling scared. Acknowledging your fears out loud releases their hold over you.
2. Understand the root of your fear
Your mind is like an onion so be open to exploring its depths.
Understanding the source of your fear allows you to release it at its deepest roots. Two writers can have a fear of rejection that stems from 2 very different incidents that lead to 2 different behavioral tendencies.
Events in our past, plant seeds for negative emotions and behaviors in the present; in order to change our behavior and emotions, we have to destroy these seeds at the root.
3. Use EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques)
EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), is a technique combining Chinese Acupuncture (no needles!) and Western Psychology to help us release negative emotions and change our behavior.
EFT is being used all over the world to cure emotional, psychological and physical disorders. It’s even been used to help people expand their creativity and athletic potential.
I recently teamed up with an EFT instructor, Jade Barbee, to create an online EFT for Writer’s Block course. As Jade was developing the course and I was testing it, something crazy happened.
I started writing non-stop and before I even knew what I was doing, I started writing a book. I’d done years of research on emotions and financial behavior but had never tried to compile that research into a book until I started testing the course.
And crazy as it sounds; I wrote a 42,000 word book in 6 months. I went from not being able to write a thing (for 3 years) to writing, researching and editing 12 hours a day nonstop for 6 months.
My book, Heart, Mind & Money, launched in June 2013 in South Africa and has already been chosen as the top 25 books to read by a South African in 2013.
4. Celebrate small wins
It’s okay to be scared of rejection. It takes a lot of courage to put yourself out there and share your work with the world.
Take the time to celebrate every time you step out of your comfort zone and allow yourself to risk rejection. Celebrate the courage it takes for you to write something and share it with the world.
5. Write despite the fear
You’re a writer so write. Write anything even if it will never see the light of day. Write for the day when you get over your fear of rejection.
I wrote poetry and wrote about money and emotions for years and never shared any of my thoughts or writings with a soul. Now that I’m unblocked I’m editing all these writings for magazines, guest blogs and yes even spoken word performances.
Whatever you do, remember that you’re a writer and that your writing can change lives.
How is your fear of rejection holding you back as a writer?
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Vangile Makwakwa is a speaker and author of Heart, Mind Money: Using Emotional Intelligence for Financial Success. She explores the link between emotions and financial behavior. Visit her website at: www.wealthy-money.com or follow her on Twitter: @vangilemakwakwa
