{"id":8877,"date":"2013-06-20T03:00:31","date_gmt":"2013-06-20T10:00:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/writersfunzone.com\/blog\/?p=8877"},"modified":"2013-06-19T13:46:49","modified_gmt":"2013-06-19T20:46:49","slug":"writing-dialogue-what-you-say-after-said","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/writersfunzone.com\/blog\/2013\/06\/20\/writing-dialogue-what-you-say-after-said\/","title":{"rendered":"Writing Dialogue: What You Say After Said by Kay Keppler"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Cover_Hope_Keppler\"<\/a>Welcome to the next installment of craft posts by monthly guest columnist,\u00a0Kay Keppler<\/a>, on novel writing.\u00a0Today she\u2019ll help you with writing dialogue.<\/p>\n

You can contact\u00a0Kay<\/a>\u00a0through the\u00a0Writer\u2019s Fun Zone<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0or at\u00a0kaykeppler AT yahoo DOT com<\/a>\u00a0to ask questions, suggest topics, or tell her she\u2019s off her rocker. (She let me say that!)<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s get one thing straight: nothing is wrong with a character \u201csaying\u201d something.<\/strong> \u201cHe said\u201d and \u201cshe said\u201d are not only acceptable<\/i> tags for dialogue\u2014I\u2019m going out to the end of the limb here\u2014they\u2019re the only<\/i> acceptable tags. If you see what I mean, she said grimly.<\/p>\n

Make the characters do the work<\/b><\/p>\n

Dialogue is fun. You can write snappy or sad or vicious or heartbreaking dialogue as your characters feel their emotions. But when you write dialogue, you want to be sure that the emotion is in the words of the character, not the tag of the author.<\/strong> You don\u2019t want to restate in your tag what is obvious to your reader.<\/p>\n

\u201cI hate what you did!\u201d she said furiously.<\/em><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t use adverbs\u2014that dreaded \u201cly\u201d form that every writing teacher cautions you about\u2014in dialogue tags.<\/strong> Your writing teachers are right. If your character (I\u2019ll call her Echo) can\u2019t say it in her own words\u2014or worse, if she has<\/i> said it and you\u2019re repeating it for emphasis\u2014just stop after \u201csaid.\u201d If Echo said it like she meant it, that\u2019s strong enough.<\/p>\n

\u201cI hate what you did!\u201d Echo said.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cSaid\u201d as a tag is basically all you\u2019ll ever need because it\u2019s neutral.<\/strong> It disappears on the page. Readers don\u2019t even see it. When you use verbs other than \u201csaid\u201d to describe Echo\u2019s words, two things can happen. First, a tag other than \u201csaid\u201d can be redundant or silly. Which is poor writing and, again, will draw you out of the story.<\/p>\n

\u201cLet go of that dog!\u201d Echo barked.<\/em><\/p>\n

You can see why that\u2019s bad. The second reason not to use any tag other than said is that any other verb stands out, making you notice, and taking you out of the story.<\/strong> Verbs not to use instead of \u201csaid\u201d include murmur, whisper, whistle, gasp, cough, cry, interrupt, state, roar, and exclaim. I\u2019m sure you can think of (I\u2019m sure you\u2019ve read<\/i>) many others. One of my favorites is \u201cexplode.\u201d (\u201cStay away from the bomb!\u201d he exploded.)<\/p>\n

Finally, you want to stick with a plain \u201csaid\u201d because anything else is bad for your story.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cI can\u2019t believe you did that!\u201d Echo said in astonishment.<\/em><\/p>\n

Telling your readers what your characters feel (and thus, what they<\/i> should feel) is poor practice for several reasons. It\u2019s redundant.<\/strong> Readers might not notice, or might not notice right away, but they\u2019ll know something is wrong. They bought that book of yours\u2014but will they buy the next one? And while readers might not notice this kind of redundancy, you can be sure that editors and reviewers will.<\/p>\n

When you tell readers how Echo feels, moreover, you\u2019re robbing your readers of the chance to bond with her. What readers want is the emotion, and they want to feel it with the characters you\u2019ve created.<\/strong> You want them to feel the astonishment that Echo feels. So let Echo express her disbelief and show her astonishment. Give her a behavior that your readers will recognize.<\/p>\n

\u201cI can\u2019t believe you did that!\u201d Echo said, dropping her dipstick into the depths of her Porsche\u2019s transmission.<\/em><\/p>\n

Okay\u2014perhaps your readers won\u2019t have dropped a dipstick into their Porsche\u2019s transmission. But by showing what Echo did, you also show how she felt\u2014and that helps readers identify with her. Who hasn\u2019t dropped something when they got big news? When Echo says, \u201cI can\u2019t believe you did that!\u201d she could be angry, or happy, or disbelieving\u2014or astonished.<\/p>\n

And when you give Echo a small action, you build her character and at the same time create a dynamic that lets your readers identify with her. That dynamic is important, because if you tell readers that Echo is astonished, but Echo doesn\u2019t do or say anything to substantiate that, you undermine Echo.<\/p>\n

Tags: A necessary part of writing<\/b><\/p>\n

Remember, the only reason we use tags at all is for clarity\u2014to show who is speaking. Keep your tags to \u201csaid\u201d and put your emotions in the dialogue.<\/strong> Your writing will be clearer, and your readers will thank you.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

\"Kay<\/a>Kay Keppler\u00a0(www.kaykeppler.com<\/a>) is an author (Zero Gravity Outcasts<\/a><\/em>,\u00a0Betting on Hope<\/a><\/em>) and editor of fiction and nonfiction (Angel\u2019s Kiss<\/a>, Outsource It!<\/em>) who lives in northern California. Contact her here or at\u00a0kaykeppler@yahoo.com<\/a>\u00a0to ask questions, suggest topics, or if you prefer, complain.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Welcome to the next installment of craft posts by monthly guest columnist,\u00a0Kay Keppler, on novel writing.\u00a0Today she\u2019ll help you with writing dialogue. You can contact\u00a0Kay\u00a0through the\u00a0Writer\u2019s Fun Zone\u00a0or at\u00a0kaykeppler AT yahoo DOT com\u00a0to ask...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":4698,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[189,2523],"class_list":["post-8877","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-writing-tips","tag-novel-writing","tag-writing-tips"],"yoast_head":"\nWriting Dialogue: What You Say After Said by Kay Keppler · Writer's Fun Zone<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Welcome to the next installment of craft posts by monthly guest columnist, Kay Keppler, on novel writing. 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