{"id":26176,"date":"2022-11-18T03:00:18","date_gmt":"2022-11-18T11:00:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/writersfunzone.com\/blog\/?p=26176"},"modified":"2022-11-11T18:12:31","modified_gmt":"2022-11-12T02:12:31","slug":"five-strategies-to-prevent-perfectionism-the-thorny-side-of-self-care-by-lisa-towles","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/writersfunzone.com\/blog\/2022\/11\/18\/five-strategies-to-prevent-perfectionism-the-thorny-side-of-self-care-by-lisa-towles\/","title":{"rendered":"Five Strategies to Prevent Perfectionism: The Thorny Side of Self Care by Lisa Towles"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Let\u2019s welcome back Lisa Towles<\/a> as she shares with us \u201cFive Strategies to Prevent Perfectionism: The Thorny Side of Self Care.\u201d Enjoy!<\/em><\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Asking for help seems like a good place to start this month\u2019s guest post.<\/strong><\/p>\n

I\u2019m delighted to have been invited by renowned writing coach and teacher, Beth Barany, to guest blog periodic posts here and I\u2019ve generally themed them around Strategic Self Care.<\/p>\n

Asking for Help<\/h2>\n

What\u2019s so hard about asking for help, and why don\u2019t we do it more often?<\/p>\n

Asking for help implies that I don\u2019t know everything<\/strong>, that there\u2019s a gap in my knowledge or capabilities and that I\u2019m neither invincible nor perfect.<\/p>\n

Really, I\u2019m not??<\/p>\n

Ouch!<\/p>\n

Asking for help displays vulnerability<\/strong>, and makes you admit that you can\u2019t always meet all of the demands of your life.<\/p>\n

Who can, though?<\/p>\n

\"Woman's<\/a><\/p>\n

The Challenges<\/h2>\n

I love talking about this part of self care because it\u2019s related to perfectionism, which is one of the thorniest aspects of all.<\/p>\n

Why thorny?<\/p>\n

Self care is challenging because we must admit that we need <\/i>care in the first place<\/strong>, and not everyone is willing to do that.<\/p>\n

If you haven\u2019t cultivated self-awareness and are not yet accustomed to self reflection and checking in, the whole idea of self care might feel frivolous or bewildering.<\/p>\n

Fear not — self care is easy<\/strong>, and you can start with something like this: sit in a quiet spot, close your eyes, put your hand on your chest and ask yourself, \u201cHow am I doing right now? What do I need?\u201d\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n

Even if your resistant self says, \u201cI\u2019m fine; I don\u2019t need anything\u201d, <\/i>that\u2019s okay.<\/p>\n

You\u2019ve still taken the time to pause and ask the question. It\u2019s a good start.<\/p>\n

Perfectionism<\/h2>\n

Perfectionism is my dirty little secret.<\/p>\n

I talk all the time about how I\u2019ve moved away from toxic patterns of perfection<\/strong>. How I\u2019ve worked with counselors and coaches of all types to bring more kindness and mindfulness to how I relate to myself.<\/p>\n

I have tools and meditation that I use to effectively cut myself slack, allowing myself to make mistakes and be okay with them.<\/p>\n

But the truth is<\/strong>, some part of me still wants to be superwoman and able to somehow do everything and be everything to everyone.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m a work in progress and that\u2019s okay.<\/p>\n

The important thing is that I now know how to recognize old patterns and what to do when I see them.<\/p>\n

\"Person<\/a><\/p>\n

For writers, perfectionism is especially tricky.<\/p>\n

When you\u2019re preparing a manuscript for publication<\/strong>, you really do need to strive for perfection in the context of editing and proofreading.<\/p>\n

So how do we reconcile these two opposing agendas?<\/p>\n

We want our book to be as perfect as it can be prior to publication, removing all errors to create the best possible experience for readers.<\/p>\n

But editing and proofreading<\/strong> \u2013 whether we\u2019re doing it ourselves or working with a publisher, is incredibly challenging, intensive, and detailed work.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s a question:<\/p>\n

How do you bring Strategic Self Care to the final stages of manuscript preparation?<\/h3>\n

It is possible to balance productivity and self care<\/strong>. Below are some tips for meeting your output goals while managing your emotional wellness in the process.<\/p>\n

\"Women<\/a><\/p>\n

Five Strategies to Prevent Perfectionism<\/h2>\n
    \n
  1. Take frequent breaks<\/strong> \u2013 I like the Pomodoro<\/a> method of 25-minute sprints followed by short breaks to keep you on your game without getting burned out.<\/li>\n
  2. Ask trusted friends or colleagues to help you share the load<\/strong> \u2013 the more eyes the better.<\/li>\n
  3. Allow yourself to make mistakes<\/strong> \u2013 find areas of your life that don\u2019t require the same precision as book editing. and allow yourself to complete a task without meeting your normal high standards (or even leave it incomplete).<\/li>\n
  4. Set Mini Goals<\/strong> \u2013 Set a schedule to meet your productivity goals but be mindful of your morale. If you start to feel frustrated and your sense of dread and overwhelm kick in, step away.<\/li>\n
  5. Treats and Rewards<\/strong> \u2013 I recommend 1 chocolate chip cookie for every ten pages edited.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    \"Typing<\/a><\/p>\n

    More Support<\/h2>\n

    I\u2019ve finally created a website for my Strategic Self Care<\/a> work, where you can read about my 5 pillars<\/a>:<\/p>\n