{"id":18794,"date":"2018-04-04T01:00:04","date_gmt":"2018-04-04T08:00:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/writersfunzone.com\/blog\/?p=18794"},"modified":"2018-04-10T09:21:05","modified_gmt":"2018-04-10T16:21:05","slug":"why-i-write-or-why-am-i-doing-this-by-beth-barany","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/writersfunzone.com\/blog\/2018\/04\/04\/why-i-write-or-why-am-i-doing-this-by-beth-barany\/","title":{"rendered":"Why I Write, Or Why Am I Doing This? By Beth Barany"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>For many years I wanted to be a writer, from a young age in fact. At age 19, one summer, there I was journal writing in earnest 20 minutes every day before my student job at the university. Because I knew that writers wrote. And that\u2019s all I knew.<\/p>\n

But I didn’t know why I wanted to write. That plagued me.<\/p>\n

At 19, I was faced with this not knowing of why I write and asked myself, \u201cSo what? Why did I have this drive? Why was I doing this?\u201d<\/p>\n

I wrote myself in circles on these questions, never coming to a satisfactory answer.<\/p>\n

I only knew that I wanted to be a writer and writers write. (My mom told me this, which was told to her by her grandmother, my great-grandmother and published author, Meridel Le Sueur<\/a>.)
\nI decided that was enough to keep me writing at the time because that was all I had to go on.
\nAnd writers write.<\/p>\n

Looking back I see what I did.<\/p>\n

I wrote in the face of deep uncertainty.<\/p>\n

I wrote even though I had no topic, no theme, no story, no grand thing to say.<\/p>\n

I was willing to be with the uncertainty, willing to be the amateur, willing to wade through the crappiness.<\/p>\n

The only thing I did know with certainty was that I could write. I could write school papers and get good grades; I could write silly rhyming limericks and lovesick poetry; I could doodle and color. I was creative.<\/p>\n

And I dreamed of being a novelist, but had no idea where to begin.<\/p>\n

I knew I could write drivel in my journal \u2014 that was good enough for now.<\/p>\n

I could write, yes. But how about being read? There\u2019s a difference. And to make up for that difference, I needed to get published. But I had no idea how to do that because I was just focused on being a college student.<\/p>\n

And then things changed. I didn\u2019t know why I was in school. I felt like I was going through the motions. All my dreams of being a published author felt so far away, so impossible I didn\u2019t even know if I would ever get there. I had no specific professional ambitions other than this impossible one. School felt like someone else\u2019s plan for me. I had to get out of there.<\/p>\n

At 21 years old, I dropped out of UC Berkeley and moved to Paris, France to be an au pair and think about what I really wanted in my life, far away from all I knew, from all family and societal expectations. I knew I would go back to school, but only once I knew WHY I wanted to.<\/p>\n

Finally in the beautiful, inspiring, and demanding City of Lights, I had the time to focus on my desire to get published.<\/p>\n

Yes. In addition to mastering French (which I did), getting published was my goal. After the fifth query, I got an article published in the Paris Free Voice<\/em>\u2014a free weekly for the English-speaking expat community. (Now called the Paris Voice<\/a>.)<\/p>\n

I learned a lot from my hustle to get my first short article published.<\/p>\n

I learned:<\/strong><\/h3>\n

\u2014 How to pitch in person (I learned from this experience that pitching in person was and is a strength of mine.)
\n\u2014 How painful revisions are, but so necessary, and can really make a piece better
\n\u2014 How important a good editor is, who encourages as much as demands excellence
\n\u2014 How much I like seeing my name in print (I think I knew this, otherwise why else would I want to be published? But it was such a validating experience to have it actually happen, I had to write another article, and did.)<\/p>\n

But getting a byline wasn\u2019t my only motivation for wanting to be published.<\/p>\n

I also wanted to say something useful and relevant. To contribute my voice to the world. To inspire other to jump into life with both feet. And I have and continue to do so.<\/p>\n

Now, my Why<\/strong> has evolved to also include the desire to write rollicking adventures to empower women and girls to be the heroes of their own lives. And I have done this and continue to do so with two fiction series and working on a third.<\/p>\n

YOUR TURN<\/h2>\n