{"id":14888,"date":"2016-03-18T01:00:12","date_gmt":"2016-03-18T08:00:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/writersfunzone.com\/blog\/?p=14888"},"modified":"2016-04-04T08:48:44","modified_gmt":"2016-04-04T15:48:44","slug":"struggling-dreaded-writers-disease-carol-malone","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/writersfunzone.com\/blog\/2016\/03\/18\/struggling-dreaded-writers-disease-carol-malone\/","title":{"rendered":"Are You Struggling With The Dreaded Writer\u2019s Disease? by Carol Malone"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Jealousy<\/a><\/p>\n

Please welcome author and teacher\/book coach in training Carol Malone<\/a>. Today she\u2019s sharing her article regarding the dreaded writer\u2019s disease known as \u201cWriter Envy.\u201d She\u2019ll speak to what it means and how to subdue it. Enjoy!<\/em><\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

How many times have we read a book,<\/strong> or a short story, or a terrific blog post and thought to ourselves, \u201cman, this is great. I wish I\u2019d written it.\u201d I do that all the time.<\/p>\n

I belong to a local county writer\u2019s group and last month our speaker mentioned he suffered from an affliction called, \u201cWriter Envy.\u201d The man, an author and screenwriter, had one of his screenplays recently produced as a movie and another is currently in production. He said that at one time or another, most all authors suffer from \u201cWriter Envy.\u201d<\/p>\n

What is \u201cWriter Envy\u201d?<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cWriter Envy\u201d happens to the best of us when we envy the success of other writers or allow the success of others define us as a writer.<\/strong> Our screenwriter guest once complained to his wife of the talents and accomplishments of a contemporary. She told him the other author was successful because \u201cshe does the work. You don\u2019t do the work.\u201d His wife added this thought, \u201cThere are no shortcuts to success.\u201d<\/p>\n

I freely admit I have suffered and still suffer \u201cWriter Envy.\u201d <\/strong>I wanted the success without the willingness to put in the long hours and difficult work to achieve it. One particular instance was when a friend asked me to edit her story for her so she could enter our group\u2019s contest\u2014the same one I was entering. She won and I didn\u2019t. Ask me if I felt \u201cWriter Envy\u201d? It\u2019s tough watching other writers succeed when we aren\u2019t quite where we\u2019d like to be, or it appears they steal our thunder by using our gracious service to help them.<\/p>\n

I wanted to learn more about this churning, bubbling disease that afflicted me, so I posted a survey to writers from a cross section of Facebook.<\/strong> I told them I was looking for some help, and that I was writing an article about professional writer\u2019s envy. I asked them the following questions:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. What are the signs that someone is envious of a peer?<\/li>\n
  2. Have you suffered envy of another author?<\/li>\n
  3. How did you handle the enviousness?<\/li>\n
  4. Jealousy is something other than envy\u2014like the fear of losing something. What are your thoughts about the difference between jealousy and envy?<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Here are some of their answers:<\/strong><\/p>\n

    Author Merillee:\u00a0 I have suffered from the plague of envy, I will admit. Typically it starts with something like, “Why did they get that when I have struggled so hard for it,” as if they have not earned what they have received. Perhaps we feel we are better at “it” than they are, though that is more pride than envy. Sometimes it is too easy for us to see the success and ignore the struggle someone faced to get there, the pain and challenges they faced along the way. When I take the time to know the other person, I often find that they have struggled, just as I am, and those feelings of envy change to find a source of inspiration in the other. On the other hand, sometimes life does just seem to come easy to some, too easy, and it is easy to feel that envy. But in those moments, I try to remember all that I have learned in the struggle, all that I have learned about myself along the way. Would I really give all that back? No. Not even if it made life “easy.” Easy is overrated anyway.<\/p>\n

    Author Allison: I think a big chunk of professional envy is buried by the person acting on it. I never want to admit to myself that’s why I “hate” the person’s work, when really it’s great but for that underlying reason I WANT to hate it.<\/p>\n

    \"Untitled<\/a>Author Brian: <\/a>Every time I feel jealous, I think of this [Dilbert] comic. Jealousy almost always (for me) stems from the (incorrect) thought that another’s success diminishes my chances of succeeding. Which is, of course, stupid. I think a sense of “Since X succeeded, I must be a failure” (that diminishment) always accompanies jealousy or envy.<\/p>\n

    Author Angela:\u00a0 I once read a book by Kate White, former editor-in-chief of Cosmopolitan, where she said that the best thing to do with envy is let it point you to where you want to go.<\/p>\n

    So how do we point the \u201cWriter Envy\u201d to the place where we want to go?<\/strong><\/p>\n

    On <\/strong>The Her Stories Project\u2014every woman has a story<\/em><\/strong><\/a> blog<\/strong>, Jessica Smock answered a letter regarding writer\u2019s envy and gave us possible insight into where we want to go with our envy:<\/p>\n

    Could envy possibly be helpful?<\/strong><\/p>\n

    In\u00a0A Writer\u2019s Guide To Persistence: How to Create a Lasting and Productive Writing Practice<\/a>, author Jordan Rosenfeld dedicates an entire chapter to envy. She says, \u201cFocusing on what others have is a form of procrastination and distraction from your own writing.\u201d She suggests that when you\u2019re feeling jealous of someone it helps to write down five steps it would take to get in a similar position to that person. We\u2019re usually more jealous of the achievement than the person. I especially like her advice to reframe the envy into something useful. She writes, \u201cEnvy is a signpost pointing you toward what you really want.\u201d<\/p>\n

    Nina also said, \u201cBe gentle with yourself for feeling envious, but be vigilant about keeping yourself from acting on it.\u00a0Nobody, including your friend, can blame you for feeling jealous. It\u2019s what you do with the envy that matters.\u201d<\/p>\n

    What does it mean to be \u201cgentle without yourself\u201d?<\/strong><\/p>\n

    Anne Lamott, in her book, Bird by Bird<\/em><\/a> said<\/em>: \u201c\u2026, it may help to remember this great line of Geneen Roth’s: that awareness is learning to keep yourself company. And then learn to be more compassionate company, as if you were somebody you are fond of and wish to encourage. I doubt that you would read a close friend’s early efforts and, in his or her presence, roll your eyes and snicker. I doubt that you would pantomime sticking your finger down your throat. I think you might say something along the lines of, ‘Good for you. We can work out some of the problems later, but for now, full steam ahead!\u201d<\/p>\n

    I adore this quote from Julia Cameron in her book, The Artist\u2019s Way<\/em><\/a>, \u201cRemember, your artist is a child. Find and protect that child. Learning to let yourself create is like learning to walk. The artist child must begin by crawling. Baby steps will follow and there will be falls\u2026\u201d We most often compare our yecchy first offerings with the completed and perfected works of the masters. Don\u2019t let that happen. Julia ended with, \u201cprogress, not perfection, is what we should be asking of ourselves.\u201d<\/p>\n

    So how do we get rid of the \u201cWriter Envy,\u201d or should we?<\/strong><\/p>\n

    We are not always the best judge of what makes us unique and special<\/strong>, so we often misjudge our own talent. We doubt out abilities and these doubts lead to a feeling of self-worthlessness. And it\u2019s these feelings of worthlessness that appear to grasp hold of the tendrils of envy and hang on tight. Envy is safe and warm and keeps us from putting ourselves out there and feeling vulnerable.<\/p>\n

    It seems as though we believe there is only so much writing success to go around<\/strong>, that someone else\u2014someone more talented is sucking up all the attention, getting all the accolades, and making all the sales. But the success of others really has no bearing on our own. There is enough to go around. We just need to believe that success is within our grasp.<\/p>\n

    I\u2019ve heard of writers who, because of the success of others<\/strong> and their subsequent envy, use that heavy emotion to spark their dedication and they finish their books and publish them. They let envy serve them because they used it in a good way\u2014as motivation, not a drag or an excuse to fail or worse\u2014do nothing.<\/p>\n

    \u201cAsk yourself whether feeling jealous, at the moment<\/strong> when the green-eyed monster strikes, is actually helping you avoid some more uncomfortable anxiety you might feel.\u201d Robin Black from her article \u201cThe Green-Eyed Writers; On Literary Envy<\/a>.\u201d<\/p>\n

    Robin also said, \u201cTry to act as if you are not jealous.<\/strong> Even though you are. Do something nice for the person who is unwittingly and unintentionally making you feel bad. Post her good news on Facebook. Or tweet it into the universe. Not for her, not at first; but for you. [\u2026] but in the interest of your own psychic comfort.\u201d<\/p>\n

    Most experts I\u2019ve read from and some of my author friends say a little envy is a good thing <\/strong>if it pushes us to do better. Write it out\u2014write out how thankful you are for the talents of others that spurs you on to greatness. Other experts suggest finding support groups where you can commiserate with other writers and share your anxiety and envy and work out a plan to overcome it. Comfort yourself with comfort food\u2014chocolate and cheese. Then get up from your writing chair and move\u2014stretch, walk, run up and down stairs, bike, or do yoga. I do Tai Chi Chih. And finally someone suggested you should watch some silly TV shows like The Muppets.<\/em><\/p>\n

    Below is a list of great articles for meeting and beating \u201cWriter Envy.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n