{"id":11142,"date":"2014-08-29T03:00:27","date_gmt":"2014-08-29T10:00:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/writersfunzone.com\/blog\/?p=11142"},"modified":"2014-08-28T10:23:34","modified_gmt":"2014-08-28T17:23:34","slug":"dont-show-dont-tell-inhabit-jackie-blain","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/writersfunzone.com\/blog\/2014\/08\/29\/dont-show-dont-tell-inhabit-jackie-blain\/","title":{"rendered":"Don\u2019t show. Don\u2019t tell. Inhabit! by Jackie Blain"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Inhabit\"<\/a>

Don’t show. Don’t tell. Inhabit! — Jackie Blain, jackieblain.com, Screenwriter Teacher<\/p><\/div>\n

Today we welcome a new columnist,\u00a0Jackie Blain\u00a0who is stopping by to chat with us today about “don\u2019t show, don\u2019t tell, inhabit!” \u00a0from a screenwriter’s perspective.\u00a0Enjoy!<\/em><\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s a simple description based on a short passage from one of my favorite mystery writers, Elizabeth Peters<\/a>, in Amelia Peabody\u2019s inimitable Victorian-era voice : <\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cEmerson\u2019s deep voice as he talked about \u2018modern inconveniences\u2019 almost put me to sleep in the bathtub, until he started shouting with rage.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

Now try the original:<\/p>\n

\u201cEmerson’s deep baritone fell pleasantly on my ears and his pungent comments on \u2018modern\u00a0 inconveniences\u2019 added spice to the news itself. Dreamily contemplating my toes, as they floated on the surface of the scented water, I fell into a kind of waking doze, from which I was rudely awakened by Emerson’s scream of rage.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The first one\u2019s \u201cfine.\u201d<\/p>\n

But the second \u2013 the original \u2013 makes us feel as if we\u2019re right there, in the bath with narrator, floating toes and all.<\/strong><\/p>\n

In fact, you can almost smell those spices wafting in the window of Shepheard\u2019s hotel in Cairo, as pungent as her husband\u2019s smart cracks about things like flush toilets.<\/p>\n

We all know \u201cshow, don\u2019t tell\u201d and \u201cuse all the senses\u201d when it comes to description. But how do we do that? How do we move from \u201cfine\u201d to \u201cimmersive<\/strong>\u201d?<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s an exercise I use with my screenwriting students, who don\u2019t have room for long descriptions.<\/strong> By the way, you might want to have someone read this to you so you can just go with it.)<\/p>\n

First, think of your favorite spot when you were a kid.<\/p>\n

It could be a hiding place, or your grandmother\u2019s kitchen. An empty field. A boulder beside the stream in your neighbor\u2019s yard.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Got it?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Next, close your eyes. Take a deep breath. Hold it. Let it out…<\/p>\n